Depression can be a very lonely disease and your relationship is an important part of how you cope with your depression. You need friends for support. Not only good weather friends but the friends who can support you when you go down. If one of my friends also stressed it’s not necessarily a bad thing. You can understand each other and maybe they’re on the bad days of each other (but not if you have a bad time at the same time). However, you should be aware of when choosing a sexual partner that your depression will have changed you as a person. It is likely that the people you get along with when depression will not be the person you want to when you better. When you are depressed you are a different person – you may not know who you really are – but your partner will be with the person you are at that time. Also, depression changes your view about the world and therefore your view of others, so that your view of your partner will not be the same when you are better.
Should I start relationships when I’m depressed?
Now, I’m not saying that you should not start a relationship when depressed. Conversely, it could be the best thing for you. It can provide the stability you need to start working through your problems and you may be able to talk with your partner about the things that you can not discuss with anyone else. Your partner may be the only person you can lounge around and began to feel himself again. Problems may arise that are not before and will not appear if you are not in a relationship. On the other hand, you may find that you keep pretending to be someone who you think you should. There is also the possibility that the relationship could fail before you are ready – probably because of your depression. This will make you worse. Either way, the stability can give you a space to begin to see things differently and confidence to begin to seek therapy.
Here are Some recommendations for relationships
However, what I strongly recommend is do not to start a relationship with someone who is also depressed. I am not a doctor but I have 25 years of experience of depression and there are two possible outcomes of this sort of relationship. First, one of you will get better, you would divide and the others will get worse. The reason is this: if you only make friends with other people your depression can help each other and if one of you would be better you could still be there to help others with your understanding and advice. However, if you are in a relationship with others depressed and one of you will be better and you split up then others will experience the end of their relationship plus the loss of their friendship and support. By all means, make friends with people who are depressed, we all need friends when we’re depressed, but wait until you have both recovered before you think about starting a sexual partnership.
Depression is difficult to completely get rid of.
Once you have that there is always a possibility of relapse. If you have recovered from your depression, but still in a relationship with someone who is depressed is very difficult to remain healed. Also, you may find that you want out of a relationship, but feel stuck because you know that someone else will get worse. Stress can be sent back to the depression. This is the second outcome – you both will remain depressed.
There are two possible outcomes remaining – the first is that you both will get better and stay together. I believe this is highly unlikely but not impossible. You both will be a different person when you are better off, with different views and personalities from when you first got together. You might still like each other but want different things. It would be great if you both managed to help each other through depression and out the other side but normal stress and strain relationships make this possible.
Living with someone who is depressed
Another result is that one of you will get better and you will stay together. I think this is most likely to occur. If you recover from depression and living with someone who is depressed you may not be truly happy. You may still remember the feeling and understanding, but there may be elements of “I got through it so you should be too.” We all know that it does not make sense as part of the depression is the feeling that you can not try again but do not people always say that ex-smokers and the worst critics of smokers?
Remember that long-term partnership is not always a bad thing when you are depressed but please think about the consequences of getting along with others depressed. Try to help each other and be there for each other but keep enough distance between you so that you help each other and do not bring each other down. In other words, stay friends and do not live with each other, at least, not until you know who you really are.
Here are some Signs of Severe Relationship Problems.